motivational coach sheli G

Posts tagged ‘Anxiety’

Fight or Flight. Sensory Disorders.

Do you have a special needs child?

I know what that is like. Oh, my son looks like any other kid. (OK a little bigger, like his daddy) But otherwise Traedyn Michael Gartman, aka “Trae” appears to be just fine. But Trae struggles with Anxiety, and also Sensory Processing challenges. He just started kindergarten, and I was surprised the teacher didn’t call me sooner. She called me his second day. I tried my best to prepare him, but I knew that everything school was about would be challenging for Trae to integrate into. We are all working on a plan, partnering together for Trae’s success.

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One definition of Anxiety is: An abnormal and overwhelming sense of apprehension and fear often marked by physiological signs (as sweating, tension, and increased pulse), by doubt concerning the reality and nature of the threat, and by self-doubt about one’s capacity to cope with it, a painful or apprehensive uneasiness of mind, stress over anticipation of events.

Trae’s anxious behaviors, or feelings may be simply due to his Sensory Processing disorder.
 
One definition of a Sensory disorder is: Sensory Integration disorder or dysfunction (SID) or Sensory Processing disorder (SPD) is a neurological disorder that results from the brain’s inability to integrate certain information received from the body’s five basic sensory systems. These sensory systems are responsible for detecting sights, sounds, smell, tastes, temperatures, pain, and the position and movements of the body. The brain then forms a combined picture of this information in order for the body to make sense of its surroundings and react to them appropriately. The ongoing relationship between behavior and brain functioning is called sensory integration (SI), a theory that was first pioneered by A. Jean Ayres, Ph.D., OTR in the 1960s.
According to Sensory Integration International (SII), a non-profit corporation concerned with the impact of sensory integrative problems on people’s lives, the following are some signs of sensory integration disorder (SID):
  • oversensitivity to touch, movement, sights, or sounds
  • under-reactivity to touch, movement, sights, or sounds
  • tendency to be easily distracted
  • social and/or emotional problems
  • activity level that is unusually high or unusually low
  • physical clumsiness or apparent carelessness
  • impulsive, lacking in self-control
  • difficulty in making transitions from one situation to another
  • inability to unwind or calm self
  • poor self concept
  • delays in speech, language, or motor skills
  • aggressive behavior

According to the book, The Out-of-Sync Child written by Carol Stock Kranowitz M.A., SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder) can cause a bewildering variety of symptoms. When their central nervous systems are ineffective in processing sensory information, children have a hard time functioning in daily life. They may look fine and have superior intelligence, but may be awkward and clumsy, fearful and withdrawn, or hostile and aggressive. SPD can affect not only how they move and learn, but also how they behave, how they play and make friends, and especially how they feel about themselves… This describes Trae well.

Sadly, many children with Sensory Processing Disorder are looked upon as the unruly, the Black Sheep, and the undisciplined. Parents are often made to feel their child’s reactions are due to poor parenting skills. The truth is these children with SPD often trapped in the painful, confusing world they live in. They cannot help feeling the fight-or-flight response when their sensory issues become triggered. And parents can not always predict when those triggers will occur.

I will never forget the first time a child care worker at church said to me “What is going on at home? There is a reason he has so much anger.” I thought, and I thought. There was NOTHING crazy going on at home. Nothing out of the normal, or really bad or traumatic to cause Trae’s behavior. We weren’t fighting. There had been no major changes. No major stress, other than what we all deal with as simple humans making life work. I wanted to hear the accusing feedback- if it was OUR fault. But I looked at Teisha, Trae’s older sister, and she was fine.

trae and teisha school Fall 2013

She is a totally different kid. Not just in personality, and family roles, but she didn’t have that anger, or the behavioral problems. And I watched kids from truly HARD homes…divorce, trauma, poverty etc. Many of them were better behaved. It made no logical sense to me. Steve and I are not perfect, but we sure work hard at healthy parenting. We changed parenting tactics. Worked on behaviors and consequences. We were eating healthy. We tried all that we knew, and it still wasn’t enough.

Thank God for Katie Wade.

Katie is a Behavioral Therapist. There are no accidents she works at my church and noticed Trae’s tough time. But instead of judging us, she took the time to find out what was Trae’s true challenge. She has helped us tremendously so far, and will continue to journey this path with us.

katie and trae
DoTERRA essential oils are also a huge help!
 essential oils

I am so grateful I found Lavender, Frankincense, and Vetiver, to name only a few, to help manage Trae’s anxiety and moods. He may be hyper-sensitive in some challenging ways, but that super-sensitivity also lends itself so well to natural, positive methods like Oil Therapy. It’s not just aromatherapy, it’s total body wellness. They are plant derived, and help the body heal itself. These oils can be taken internally, applied topically, and diffused into the air. I have my kids on the vitamins too. I am a huge FAN of holistic solutions that help parents avoid medications, when possible. Read more about natural remedies to every ailment here:


Perhaps it’s time for testing.
If they are struggling at school, you can request testing there. Or if that doesn’t work out, you can try to contact your local Heath Department for Early Intervention services. Or find a trusted Children’s Behavioral Therapist. Our kids deserve to receive the information, tools and support, and not feel like they are drowning in their disability. Ignorance or denial of disorders or disabilities are a huge killer of success for both kids and adults. But as parents, it’s our job to advocate for our kids. They cannot do it on their own.

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And you deserve to know, it’s not your fault. Sure, we make mistakes. And ALL our gene pools are imperfect. American diets are not generally good. (* True Organic diets do help almost all disorders, illnesses and behavioral challenges).

Do the best you can, with what you’ve got. That’s what we get to do. The challenges will arise, and we as parents and teachers can only stare them down, get educated, take proactive steps to help our kids, work hard, and take one day at a time for their ultimate SUCCESS.

We can do this. And God bless us all in the effort. It isn’t easy.

SPD it gets better

Many Blessings,
 Sheli  G
CILC | CMC | CEBC

www.shelig.com
International Speaker, Group Transformationist, Inspirational Comedian, Author 
“It’s time to unleash the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

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Mind Traffic Jams: 5 tips to help

red bull

LOL… OK I hope you did NOT put Red Bull in your coffee. It’s bad for you, all by itself!   🙂

But- if you are like me, you have days where you feel like this! Ah… the noise of a single mind. So many thoughts, ideas, fears, to-dos, visions…all ricocheting together. They collide and   sometimes explode, falling lifeless onto the proverbial ground. How can we implement some of what starts to be created in the expansiveness of the mind?

“It’s the world we live in. It’s the technology and information age on steroids. We are all victims of it…”

Really? Well- it may feel that way at times. But I believe that this very moment is yet another opportunity to look at where we are today, with all the information and a world that changes overnight, and ask ourselves: “What will work the best for me today, to keep me on track, and intentionally implement some of my ideas, and fulfill my top priorities?”

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Here are some simple daily tips I use.

1) Write it down. Like NOW.

Pull over. Write it down. It takes a minute or a few minutes at the most. But when that inspired, unique Blog idea, URL name, slogan, marketing idea, or great connection you must call…when those potentially Golden-nugget-thoughts come into your overloaded brain; for the love of all visions yet to manifest– WRITE IT DOWN. Don’t hope that you remember it later. (especially if you are past 40, just sayin.) Hope isn’t a good plan, and important things will get “lost” in the brain wave haze.

Write it on your laptop, smartphone, desktop, ipad…

Your iPhone can (depends on your settings) take your notes, organize them, and send them automatically to your email. Shazam!

mind iphone note

2) Voice record it. NOW.

Same idea, only it’s got sound. The iPhone can record you quickly via “Voice Memos”.

I am a Motivational Speaker and a song Writer/Singer, so sometimes it’s not just text ideas that I want to record, but the way I say something, or the specific melody/music to it. I can also email or message those voice memos. It’s perfect to turn on and record while I drive- (no texting) Then when I arrive, I can send the memo to someone, including me 🙂 You can delete them easily, and you are not killing trees with random sticky notes. Want a speaking gig, but don’t have a relevant clip to send? Short on time? Record an amazing short clip on the target market’s hot button, and text or email it. This will do more to land that gig than a resume will. I’m sure there are comparable aps on other smartphones as well.

iphone-voice-memos-02

3) Vid that idea. ASAP.

Youtube is powerful social media. 90% of the population watch at least 1 video per day, more than 50% of those are on YouTube. If you are speaking to Millennials at all, they watch videos way more than they check out text. So record your elevator pitch. Record your tips, ideas, and epiphanies. Got a killer blog post? Make it a vid. What is your special message to the world? Start making a video journal of what you are working on weekly. If you can, do one per day. 1 minute to 20 minutes… pack them with mega value, super current information, and your passion. People don’t just buy new, unheard of products anymore. They know Nike already- so they will buy that. But what are you selling? How is it clearly differentiated from your competition? Or is your message drowning in all the social media, blogging and website buzz out there. Your audience needs a face and an authentic personality behind the brand to see if that brand vibes with them.

4) Prioritize.

At the beginning of the day, look at your notes, emails, lists, calenders, recordings. Prioritize with the most urgent and/or fabulous ideas and to-dos first.

At the end of the day, take a quick inventory again : 1) what got done and 2) what is FIRST on the list tomorrow. Some people spend more time worrying about what needs to be done than just doing. Don’t worry, just intentionally set up your day with the highest needs first. Give yourself grace on what didn’t get done. Then, do some intentional goal setting for the next day or the day of. Do what you can, where you are with what you have. That is all we can do, and it is enough. If it really isn’t enough, it may be time to let some tasks, people, places and things go so you are not so overwhelmed. Do what you can commit to and do well. Quality of life outweighs quantity of to-dos every time.

5) Eat the Frog.

Start by “Eating the the Frog”. The Frog is the hard thing to do. A crappy call you have to make? Do it out of the gate before the day gets you and the excuses mount. Bills to pay? Knock those out first thing. Blogging needs to be done? Do it while you are fresh. Block out alone time if you need that. Anniversary gift? Make this high on the list, or delegate it out if you know you suck at getting this done and/or don’t have time…. but do have an assistant. YOU know YOU best. What do you need to do to get your top priorities done really well, and keep your head on throughout the day? What can you do to support yourself in manifesting your dreams, goals and plans? Only you can control your day. That may include setting boundaries, like “Closed Door Meetings” with yourself, to tackle those things that you cannot be interrupted while during. Stuff happens and throws the day off, but we don’t have to do that to ourselves by letting the chaos of any given day just happen to us. Manage what you can. This will leave you more patience and energy for the surprise moments where unannounced chaos meets you.

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No more wondering what that great song was that you wanted to download! No more thinking of a fab blog idea, then getting to your computer and going totally bloggersblock-blank. No more things rattling aimlessly around in your head all day, only for you to lay your head on the pillow at night and say; “Did I get one thing completely done today, or start anything I really wanted to?”

Taking steps every day towards our many goals and priorities is the way most successful people get anything done. Don’t be a victim of brain traffic anymore. Don’t beat yourself up for under-performance. Harness your incredible, brilliant brain power and ideas. You are in control of your day, as you choose and plan to be.

sheli  G
CILC | CMC | CEBC
www.shelig.com
www.shelig.com
Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Success Coach
“It’s time to Level UP, and harness the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

The Wizard of AHAs

oz dorothy in house

Who can forget this totally legit, classic movie? (Although the Wicked Witch STILL freaks me out!)

Well, there is so much more behind Dorothy’s story than we all knew! Never fear, I can fill you in from here…

You see, Dorothy had a whole BUNCH of common ailments she was privately struggling with. She thought if she ran away from home, this would cure everything. She struggled with things like:

Depression, Anxiety, Panic attacks, Insomnia, Headaches, Allergies and more. She couldn’t take all her overwhelming symptoms anymore, so off she went to distract herself from these issues, and find someplace “Over The Rainbow” to see if she would feel better there!

Upon landing in OZ, besides having a headache, feeling terribly jet-lagged and sore, Dorothy was immediately seized by sneezing, coughing…. allergies!  They were much worse in OZ, unfortunately. (so many flowers were blooming there!)

oz flowers

Soon Dorothy’s depression was escalating again, and her anxiety attacks were really coming on! Lucky for Dorothy, she met Scarecrow! Scarecrow was so sweet, and helped distract Dorothy from her own problems, especially when she noticed how screwed up he was too! YES! She was not alone. He also had Allergies and Anxiety, but Scarecrow often struggled with feeling like he had no brain! In truth, he DID have a brain, but sadly he couldn’t focus, he was so easily distracted! He was also really hyper sometimes, and it made learning and just sitting still difficult. One time, some bullies pulled him completely apart! He had Arthritis pains and inflammation from his injuries. So they set off together, hoping that the Wizard of Dr. Oz Dorothy had heard about could help. He apparently was some big, important dude, who claimed he could magically fix anyone.

Soon they bumped into Tin Man. Ironically, Tin Man ALSO seemed sad and in fear, because he thought he had no heart. He had been taking a medication that left him feeling numb instead of better. “Jeepers, is everyone a mess or what?” Dorothy thought. Tin Man also had many aches, pains, rust and mold from being stuck in one position for so long, out in the rain. He had many bug bites that were also bothersome. PLUS, he was so dirty and smelly from not being cleaned for so long. He too needed much help! He joined the adventure to go see Dr. Oz. The Tin Man had Googled Dr. Oz, and the reports on him were both favorable and grandiose, AND quite negative and debatable. There was also great controversy over who was funding Dr. Oz, and the “solutions” he so quickly handed out to all who came.

Now the Wicked Witch was sent from a large covert agency, protected at the highest levels, to cause all kinds of grief and challenges for Dorothy and her friends. She would spray horrible pesticides on all the flowers and food she could find, which polluted everything, and made the people sick. She would give out medicines to “cure” the people of their ailments, but alas, many would become more sick, or even die from the side affects. She was truly evil indeed.

oz witch

The uplifting news was, Glenda, the Good Witch, also appeared from time to time. She smelled wonderfully of Lavender and Sandalwood, which calmed Dorothy and her friends down immediately. She always seemed happy and grounded, (plus her skin was so dang perfect!) Dorothy and her friends were very impressed by her. Glenda always gave Dorothy and her friends hope, that there were answers they would certainly find as they stayed on the sometimes difficult journey of discovery.

oz glenda

Then Dorothy, Scarecrow and Tin Man met Lion. Dorothy soon realized her panic attacks were small-scale compared to Lion’s! He had so much fear, he couldn’t stop shaking. He rarely went out to meet people, and always ran away when he thought challenge was near! He couldn’t keep any job. He was even more depressed than the rest of them, crying all the time! He also had scar tissue from a bad fight (with his wife), and Diabetes. Lion had always eaten too much processed sugar and artificial dyes, given to him largely from the Wicked Witch in her candy and treats. They were all poisons.  “Good grief, MOST of us have issues, don’t we?” Dorothy exclaimed. This started another crying fit from Lion, and so the crew set out to finally meet Dr. Oz, hoping he truly would have all the answers they so desperately needed!

lion oz

When they reached Dr. OZ, there was a sign on his door: “We no longer take most insurances. You must pay BIG cash for all solutions given out here. I am out to lunch and then golfing for a week or two in Hawaii, come back later. For emergencies, call 911”

Well, Dorothy and her Motley Crew were devastated. They intuitively knew all along, that it had all sounded too good to be true.

Just then, they smelled sweet Lavender and Sandalwood… “Glenda!” They all shouted out in glee! “We are in trouble! We have so many problems that are keeping us from enjoying life! What can you do to save us from all our symptoms?”

Glenda smiled. “You three have always had what you needed to be well, you just needed to realize that someone else cannot heal you with their “magic”, only you can do that.” Dorothy and her friends were confused. “Only we can do that? But how?”

“Well, now that you are ready and open to listen to this, Dorothy! God gave you some killer Diva Ruby Pumps girl! If you click your heels three times, they will activate some amazing pure essential Oils to come out of Tin Man’s oil can. These oils have many, if not all the answers for your ailments, symptoms, emotional imbalances and then some. Ready to give them a try? They are all natural, so they cannot hurt you, only help you. I too used to suffer from depression, but not anymore”. “YOU?!! Depressed?!!” Dorothy and crew said in total shock and amazement. (They had always thought Glenda was on Crack, or something that made her happy all the time.)

“What have we got to lose” They all exclaimed! Dorothy clicked on her Ruby Pumps three times…

oz pumps

Lo and behold, Tin Man’s oil can filled up! First with: Lavender,  Orange, Melissa, Sandalwood, Balance, and Elevation oils for all their Depression, Anxiety, Insomnia and more.

Then it was full of Frankincense, one of the most powerful oils of all time, which helped all their aches, pains, inflammation, confusion, wrinkles, fatigue, infections, pre-cancerous cells and SO much more.

Next is always a crowd favorite, Deep Blue. It instantly provided pain relief from sore achy muscles and joints, plus began the longer healing process with all their former injuries. Heavenly!

Then came Purify and On Guard oils to clean and disinfect their bodies, shoes and clothes. Dorothy was so glad to know she could clean her whole house and car with no toxic fumes for her or Toto to inhale. Ahhhhh.

Then the wonderful Melaleuca Oil for Toto’s painful chronic ear infections.  🙂

  • Headaches? Past Tense(blend) or Peppermint
  • ADD or ADHD symptoms? Vetiver, In Tune(blend), Lavender, Serenity(blend), Elevation(blend), Balance(blend), Frankincense, Melissa
  • Bug Repellant? Terrashield(blend)
  • Asthma/Allergies? Breathe(blend), Peppermint, Frankincense (2 drop Lemon+2 drops Lavender+2 drops Peppermint in an all natural veggie capsule= organic antihistamine)
  • Weight Issues? Slim and Sassy(blend)
  • Spider Issues? Peppermint diluted with water in a spray bottle
  • Wicked Witch? On Guard kills bacteria, viruses, and most bad things. 🙂  All doTERRA oils are Antibacterial.

There is so much more… but you get the idea. *Along with a healthy organic diet, lots of filtered water, exercise and good rest, and pure essential oils are another incredible solution to thousands of issues we all face every day.

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Please like and share if this can help someone else, or someone you love. BE WELL!!!

Many MIRACULOUS Blessings,

Sheli G Speaker | CEO Women Ignite | Team Igniter | Comedian 

www.SheliG.com

www.shelig.com

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