motivational coach sheli G

Archive for the ‘thoughts from sheli G’ Category

WII-TALK short bursts of genius

The collaborators behind Women Ignite Idaho are so excited to bring you an amazable opportunity; Get YOUR 1-4 video minute message out, and maybe, get on the big stage at the 2016 Women Ignite Idaho Conference, Oct 21-22 in downtown, Boise.

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Facebook Timeline Covers

WI get 100’s of requests each year to speak at the annual conference. It’s truly a wonderful problem to have! But we know, there are thousands, maybe millions of messages out there in the hearts, minds, experiences, ideas and stories of women. Here is a way we can share some incredible messages online, and lift up at least one or more mini message at our annual conference, too. 

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You see, WI are just like you…passionate. Driven. Called. And we truly want to make a big difference, in our communities, and in the world! But we get it. We cannot do it alone. And neither can you. 

So when you hear yourself going off, compassionately, about your cause. Your mission. Your idea. Your story, poem or dream, get our your cell phone, or have a friend video you. Then, simply send it to Women Ignite Idaho, at this link: http://m.me/womenigniteidaho

OR email us at: sheligcoaching@gmail.com. Please include your name and best email too.

That’s it! If you win, we can either play your message on the big stage, on our huge twin screens, OR if you like, you can do it live. The WI Team will vote on all the messages received, to decide which ones to share on social. *No profanity please, and because social media includes children, please plan accordingly. Thank you!

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Please share this with someone who you know that has a message that deserves to be heard! Like, comment and connect with us. And remember, Their ceiling. Your floor.

https://www.facebook.com/womenigniteidaho/

 

BW Sheli G

Sheli G Speaker | CEO Women Ignite | Team Igniter | Comedian         sheligcoaching@gmail.com | www.SheliG.com

 

 

 

 

 

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You Can’t Buy Mastery

Twenty years ago, I watched phenomenal facilitators work with people in human development. I studied and listened in awe while they, as we say in Personal Development Land, “processed” their students. These facilitators or coaches would do focused work with the students, from the students point of tension, pain or confusion. The facilitator would guide them, as the student was willing, to the other side, or at least help them to take some real some steps forward. This experiential learning is profound in both business settings, or personal growth.

I was amazed.

It was incredible to see these coaches real-time, and watch as their intuitive hits rang spot on, nearly every time they spoke. What?? Yes.

In my naiveté I wondered… how do they know? How do they see what’s behind the mask of emotion, the story, the walls, or the rhetoric? How did they know that person was ready to finally breakthrough or scale? Now, I know.

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It’s a calling.

Sounds spiritual. And…I believe it is. When you step into your calling, purpose or cause, the greatest parts of you are unlocked and ignited. Your intuitive or spiritual self combines with your ability, education and effort. When you find the thing or things that you were created to do, if you’re aware, you know.

And then there’s the final key to mastery, time. You can’t quick-link to that level of mastery simply from text books, teachers and mentors. You can’t metabolize quotes, information or inspiration, such that you can just propel it forward into others, with spot on timing and nearly flawless delivery.

When someone who isn’t ready attempts a mastery level role, their students or employees won’t find as much value.

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The gold, magic and pure power of experience,  collaborates to bring all your raw talent and passion together.  It’s hard to articulate if you’ve never experienced it yourself.

I studied hard. I was trained, mentored, and certified in personal development and business consulting. #serialentrepreneur I worked and I served for countless hours. Years of being a committed, consistent student, working from where I was, both failing and succeeding along the way… and yet reaching for mastery. Those are the touchstones of my capacity to deliver my work today. And I just adore what I do.

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The Big Mistake…
Is- skipping parts of this rights-of-passage process, because of impatience, poor mentoring, ego or entitlement. To be exceptional, your mastery levels must always be humbly, earned.

Don’t skip any part of the perfect process that these elements will bring to your practice, cause or calling. The old truth of 10,000 hours of experience, or something like that, truly is the golden key that brings your vision to fruition.

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The Secret
Humility reminds you to take the journey, with no shortcuts. Humility… when you know that there is so much yet to learn about, experience and understand. And when you reach a mastery level, you will know. But, you will still make mistakes. And you won’t think of the epic successes as yours, but they will belong to your clients, and those you mentor.

And as you continue, more humility greets you with the kiss of knowing, that we are all equally called to greatness. No one is ever bigger or smaller in the circle. It’s not about Race. Geography. Gender. Profession. Religion. The big difference is, only some say yes to the call.

Say Y E S

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Sheli G
Speaker | Team Igniter | Comedian | Author
sheligcoaching@gmail.com | http://www.SheliG.com

Finding Significance Part 1

Finding Significance part 1

“What IS Significance”

sig•nif•i•cance (sɪgˈnɪf ɪ kəns)
n.

1. importance; consequence.
2. meaning; import.
3. the quality of being significant.
globe key
In my Business Consulting and Life Mastery Coaching, one desire seems to be consistent in people from all walks of life. People from every background, religion, race, personality type, culture, belief system, profession etc. seem to have this in common: we all want to be significant today, maybe now more than ever before.
I have found the only exceptions to this common desire, are the people who have not yet realized they could attain significance, OR the ones who have given up hope that they will ever experience it personally.
help homeless
What IS significance? That answer is as unique as you are, and must be defined by each individual. Importance. Making a difference. Being the change you wish to see in the world. Doing God’s work. Leaving a legacy. Creating a measurable, positive change. How do YOU define it? This is important, if you are searching for “Significance Street” in your life.
where is my way

Significance can only be defined by you, designed by you, and attained by you.

It may be winning an Olympic Gold Medal, and using that massively public platform to be a positive change agent. OR it may be helping the elderly by making their meals, when no one is watching. Significance for you may be attaining a career in public speaking where you literally touch hundreds or thousands of lives each month. Or it may be about your amazing MLM product that helps people be healthy, one client at a time. You may coach kids, or be a prayer warrior, a financial planner, or a volunteer in cities during disasters, or you may be the best friend or spouse someone could ever have.

It may be, and I believe it usually is, a combination of actions creating tangible results, that come from our core beliefs and habits, that make our lives as a whole significant, if we choose in.
Firefighter Holding Child
I believe we all are born with a purpose. A way or ways that each one of us, in our own unique strengths, can truly achieve greatness in whatever small and big ways we decide to. Quite often life is a huge challenge, and we each have our weaknesses to navigate. But our individual strengths, when finely tuned, can be our genius that we offer to the world. In fact- I would say we owe it to the world. It needs us. It needs you. From my perspective, our strengths are our spiritual gifts that can empower us to be significant in positive ways, that can create ripple affects of hope and change now, and ongoing.
give the world the new generation - Usa - sea background

Check back for Part 2 of The Finding Significance Street Series when we look at the question: What does it take to actually achieve true significance?

Many Blessings,
sheli  G
L81C8894-Edit[1]
CILC | CMC | CEBC
www.shelig.com
CEO Women Ignite Idaho Conference and Trade Show
WomenIgniteIdaho.com
International Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach
“It’s time to ignite the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

Facebook LinkedIn WordPress YouTube pinterest
Contact me: Skype coach.sheli

 

Destiny 2014

What is a Transformational, Experiential workshop?

Is that just a fancy sounding motivational seminar? Yes. And- No.  It’s a phenomenal hybrid.

Decades ago, “Personal Development Land” as I lovingly call it, was born. It was a place where people stopped the daily routine and mania. They took an intentional seat to listen to dynamic facilitators give new perspectives on living, collaborating and being. They participated in fascinating, illuminating processes- designed to make you think, notice, stretch and grow. These processes successfully cause significant, tangible, and long term change for the willing participants.

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This growth phenomenon caught on, and has evolved over the years. Development draws people in from all walks, professions, pasts, religions and race. It is what the leaders of today just DO. It is today’s advanced personal and professional degree. It is necessary, in order to go where the real influencers in 2014 intend to go.

We have enjoyed our inspirational/motivational seminars over the years… Zig Ziglar. Les Brown. Anthony Robbins. John Maxwell. Jim Rohn… many more. They were and some still are incredible speakers and facilitators. The dominant personalities in this genre have been mostly men. I have personally been mentored by Zig, Les and John, and those are some incredible highlights in my own journey.

Women- it’s our TIME.

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Of course, anyone in business, sales, network marketing or Corporate America have done their share of business seminars and classes. Some were epic. Some were…..yawn.

Today– we are all on the move at a rapid rate We don’t compartmentalize things anymore. We don’t have time. And, perhaps we realize our lives are a complex combination of it ALL: Business, Personal, Relational, Financial, Spiritual, Mental, Physical etc.

Welcome to the new model of Transformation. “Destiny 2014”. A Mastermind-Workshop-Motivational-Challenging-Inspirational-Community-Intensive series in July for women. Whew! 🙂

Women who are ready to IGNITE their businesses and their lives to a whole new paradigm of abundance and real, sustainable growth.

Women who are done with average.

Women who know that to scale at significant rates, you must do what few accept the challenge of doing.

Women who are clear that the “360 perspective” is the only current model producing growth at the rate and level they desire.

Women like you.

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Time is precious, urgent, and your important message deserves a broader audience. ~sheli G

The Dates: July 25-27

The Times: Fri 6:30-10, Fri & Sat 8-5:30pm

The Cost: $195

The What: A Transformational Workshop Series to scale you at exponential rates with the sessions, strategic homework and assignments in between, and a community of seekers, like you.

Contact me for details: sheligcoaching@gmail.com

About the Facilitators…

Dr. Frank White

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Frank White, MBA, PhD, Forum Certified Master Coach and Trainer, Founding member of IMPACT an international Association of Coaches, Consultants and Trainers Frank White is a nationally acclaimed speaker, business & executive success coach, management consultant, sales and leadership trainer and motivational expert. During his successful corporate career Frank was responsible for the development of five national and regional retail chains and served as President and CEO of four, where he was responsible for the opening of 450+ retail operations. He founded F.A. White & Associates in San Francisco Ca. in 1985 and has gone on to train and coach 1000’s of business executives and leaders and has delivered sales and sales management training and development programs to 1000’s of top sales leaders nationally and throughout Asia. He is a highly sought after speaker, trainer and coach. He is currently the president of F.A. White & Associates and Frank White International.

sheli G  CILC | CMC | CEBC

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International Speaker, Master Certified Business Coach, World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach. Sheli Gartman is the founder of sheli G Business and World Changer Leadership Coaching.

Sheli travels the globe specializing in E.T.E. Experiential Transformational Education is a hands on method that produces profound discovery & dynamic human development, igniting Entrepreneurs, Individuals and Companies to achieve their highest potentiality and true calling. Sheli G has worked for more than twenty years with large Corporations, Small Businesses, Community events, Non-Profits, and individuals who are seeking to maximize their reach. Sheli G is among the internationally acclaimed  professionals who are the WORLD CHANGERS in the Transformational Business and Personal Expansion arena. She considers it a true honor to put her authenticity, extensive experience and passion to work for you. Sheli is married to Steve and they have three miraculous children.

Many Blessings,
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CILC | CMC | CEBC
www.shelig.com
CEO Women Ignite Idaho Conference and Trade Show
Image
WomenIgniteIdaho.com
http://www.facebook.com/womenigniteidaho
International Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach
“It’s time to ignite the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

Facebook LinkedIn WordPress YouTube pinterest
Contact me: Skype coach.sheli

 

Video

Pastors. Presidents. CEO’s…Get Naked.

Leaders. Influencers. Speakers. Authors. It’s time. It’s PAST time. Time to GET REAL.

eye3

If you are already real, then cool beans. BUT, If not….

Quit acting like you have no insecurities.

Quit acting like you don’t make mistakes.

Quit acting better than.

Quit being in denial about your own issues, because you’re so good at exposing others weak spots. I know, because we all have them. I have them, big-time. You do too.

Don’t get me wrong. There are some really, really good leaders. GREAT leaders. WORLD CHANGING Leaders! YES! Just- not nearly enough.

Church.

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The American Church. Many nice buildings, where people dress up nice. They put on nice faces. AND- they shove down their hurts, habits, hangups, dark secrets and sins…and act all “Sunday School”. Not because they want to, actually. But because that is what they have been trained to do. It’s is what they know how to do in typical church culture. They mean well! They just don’t know how to show up any differently. And, would it be really OK if they did? If they came in smoking. If they admitted to the addiction. If they said their marriage was hanging on by a thread. If they admitted to being attracted to the same sex. If they told you they were bankrupt. If they said they had been abused by a church member….. Well, um…what then? Are we actually ready for that? We should be. They need love, a SAFE place to meet God and do their work, resources, support and answers. I need that. You do too. Bring on the Naked Church.

The perfect church service,would be one we were almost unaware of.
Our attention would have been on God.
 C.S. Lewis

Government.

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I know. I actually dread saying it. I cannot believe I am bringing it up. I usually avoid it. It brings up more triggers for people today than religion. For real. It divides us. Even though we all feel we know the right way… The “truth”. Then- why is everything so screwed up? We accuse the Millennials of not trusting or respecting authority. Should they?

leaders 3

We are the voters. All this blame stuff hasn’t worked. To change, to get better, we have to ALL take responsibility. To be accountable- for ourselves, our history, our current state, and mostly for our future. Honestly, can you or I trust what ANY president says? 100%? Regardless of the party affiliation. Would you stake your life on any president being set up in the system we currently have, to tell the TOTAL truth, transparently, without political or personal repercussion or retribution? I need that honesty and transparency in order to trust. You do too. Bring on the Naked Government.

“In my country we go to prison first and then become President.”~Nelson Mandela

“Unlike some politicians, I can admit to a mistake.”~Nelson Mandela

CEO’s.

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Many leaders, both men and women, are still driven from EGO the majority of the time. A great education, great experience, a good cause, a great mind…they are not enough today. A true World Changing leader also develops oneself internally; with expansive personal development, spiritual awareness and authentic global concern. Leaders are not just modeling how to do business as usual; they should be modeling how to live a well balanced, truly healthy life in all aspects.

Women currently hold only 4.2 percent of Fortune 500 CEO roles, and 4.2 percent of Fortune 1000 CEO roles. Dr. Jack Zenger argues that this is due primarily to a change in leadership styles. Moving from a command-and-control style of leadership to a more collaborative model plays, he argues, to women’s strengths. Women are better listeners, better at building relationships and more collaborative and that, he argues, makes them better adapted to the demands of modern leadership. Asked to explain, therefore, why women haven’t fared better in the corporate hierarchy, he’s at somewhat of a loss. Thirty six percent of men say they want to be CEO, where only 18 percent of women say they do. Women have two jobs — the notorious second shift at home — while men, well, don’t do quite so much. And Zenger thinks also that boards simply lack confidence in women. Few have ever seen a female CEO and don’t recognize that, Dr. Zenger says.

this is who I am

I believe our men can also be supported to bring in more of the relational, collaborative style to their leadership. I think they are hungry for it too. It’s not our dad’s corporate culture anymore. Relationships matter.

There are also too many companies with a culture of cut-throat competition. Collaboration IS inspiration! Don’t we know? Pride on steroids and fierce vs. playful competition drowns the human creative and productive spirit. It also drops your ROI long term.

Some companies have laid so many people off, that they have great people left…doing the job of 3-4 people. I spoke to a friend who manages a team at HP. She said everyone on her team was on some sort of antidepressant. This is the net result, I believe, of asking great people to cram 3 work days into 1.  It’s a short term model. It’s unhealthy. A burn out plan. A profit killer.

When will we all get on the train of connectedness, allowing people to find their strengths, and give them the tools to help them identify and cultivate those? Then- allow them to operate and SOAR in those supernatural strengths. That’s what a real leader does- they show others how to harness the World-Changing Leader in themselves. Everyone has sheer brilliance in something. Everyone has passion. People are AMAZING!!!!   We all just need to be unlocked. I do. and you do too. Bring on the Naked Leadership.

This is the sassiest blog I have ever written. I would apologize… as I truly don’t mean to offend or hurt anyone. But, it’s really “up” for me. I know because my heart rate is up while I write this! It’s real. I feel it needs to be said. I don’t even know all the reasons why. But there it is. Bring on the Naked Blogging.

world changer

Many Blessings,
sheli  G
CILC | CMC | CEBC

www.shelig.com
International Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach
“It’s time to unleash the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

Facebook LinkedIn WordPress YouTube pinterest
Contact me: Skype coach.sheli

10 Surprising Comparisons: Eagles and Leaders

eagle 1

The bald eagle (Haliaeetus leucocephalus), the US national bird, is the only eagle unique to North America.
Eagles are large, powerfully built birds of prey

Let’s look at some very interesting comparisons between the World Changing Leader and the Eagle. Some may surprise you…

10) Eagles sit at the top of the food chain. This makes them more vulnerable to toxic chemicals in the environment, since each link in the food chain tends to concentrate chemicals from the lower link.

As a leader, there are many dynamics at play when you are at “The Top”.

eagle top

Zig Ziglar’s famous book, “See you at the Top” written some twenty five years ago wasn’t the first nor will it be the last to attract leaders globally with the focus of being at the top! But what does that mean? To be a leader is a huge responsibility. To whom much is given, much is certainly expected. When you rise up to significant leadership positions of a company or a team, you will have all eyes on you for stand-apart organizational and inspirational direction. However, I find that most leaders, myself included- are much harder on ourselves.

We set our own bar EXCEPTIONALLY (freakin) HIGH.

As we work with people, we find that we are deeply involved/invested in their professional bliss, and their challenges. But we also find ourselves in the midst of their personal ups and downs too. Leadership today isn’t a neatly compartmentalized system. Leaders come along side of the people looking to us for inspired direction, and we do not draw those Black and White lines in the sand. So- we as leaders find ourselves exposed. We are exposed to people’s tragedies, toxins and toils. A World Changing leader knows how to authentically help and direct, but not to metabolize and hang on to those toxins inwardly.

9) Eyesight – An eagle’s eye is at least four times as powerful and sharp as that of a person with perfect vision.

eye 2

What is it like, to see clearly from miles and miles away- when others can only see in the short distance? World Changers must be able to not only grasp a vision that inspires themselves, but they must be able to articulate that vision outward, and enroll others successfully into that picture. 

8) Eagles do not sweat, so they use many other creative cool-down methods.

I know- Leaders DO sweat. 🙂

BUT World Changing Leaders don’t show it. Today’s leader knows when to be vulnerable. To be authentic and real in a country where we have a lot of uber superficiality that is promoted- isn’t easy. *I am a big fan of the Leader that understands the necessity and timing of intentional Vulnerability.

https://embracereal.wordpress.com/2013/09/20/leadersblack/

That said, our teams and companies do not need to see us sweat, ie; panic, freak out, over-react, project frustration onto them, or make irrational accusations or decisions. We have all seen leadership like that, be they owners, managers, team leaders or (gulp) the government. What our teams DO need to see from us, is our intentional cool/calm down methods, and come back to them clear, grounded, inspired and ready to continue partnering with them to get through the eye of any storm, together.

7) Eagles tolerate VERY cold temperatures.  A bald eagle’s skin is protected by feathers lined with down. Their feet are cold resistant.

Leaders can take subzero temperatures.

Economy turns. Employee challenges. Stiff Competition. Cultural Apathy. The most difficult decisions. High Stakes meetings. Pressure. Extreme COLD and extreme HEAT.

Simon Cowell, creator of American Idol, once told Oprah Winfrey “I have to be that tough on the contestants. If they cannot handle me, my feedback and challenging them, they are no where near ready to face Hollywood and the cold hard press.” How very true. Likewise, if you are too sensitive and defensive, taking everything personally, you will never make it long term as a manager or Entrepreneur. It will destroy you. Not everyone is cut out for the pressure. We all have different, amazing gifts. That is the beautiful thing.

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6) Beak.  A Bald Eagle’s beak is a strong weapon, but is also delicate enough to groom a mate’s feathers or feed a small portion of food to a newly hatched chick. The beak of a captive eagle is not worn down naturally, so it must be trimmed annually.

I think this is a great metaphor for our powerful voice as a leader.

finding-your-voice

Leaders do well when they are passionate, eloquent, profound, and phenomenal speakers; from the large crowds to an intimate one on one. Our words have the power to heal, help, and honor. Our words can also wound, tear, and destroy. We must be vigilant to be truly responsible for what we say. Are our words valuable, helpful, wise and thought out? If not, trim back the beak! Get a Life and Leadership Mastery Coach to objectively help. And remember, an “I’m sorry” from a leader is powerful- when it’s authentic. We all screw things up sometimes. World Changers own their mistakes.

5) Talons.  Eagles can open and close their talons at will. If an eagle is dragged into the water by a fish too large for the eagle to lift, it is because the eagle refuses to release it. In some cases this is due to hunger.

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My friend and mentor Les Brown says “You’ve got to be HUNGRY!”

Hungry IS good. But, scarcity; emotionally, physically, financially, or spiritually for too long- isn’t good. When the fish is too big, or you are not ready, drop it before YOU go completely under. There was a time many years ago that after economic turns, competitive pressures, and a bogus former employee law suit all came into play… I realized that a business I had started, also needed to come to a close. It wasn’t easy at that time. I had prepared for the GO GO GO do do do! I had not realized that some dreams are for a time, and they are meant to end too. Those are the lessons, and our teachers, and they are for a time. It’s OK. If a business, relationship, habit, behavior, addiction, job, or whatever is dragging you under, please- don’t go down with the Titanic. Open your talons and let go! Create the space in your hands and heart for the magnificent fish that is coming, that is the perfect one for RIGHT NOW.

4) Most Birds of Prey look back over their shoulder before they move forward in a hunt. Not Eagles.

Some look back. Don’t.

In my favorite book it says: “Forgetting what is behind, and reaching forth unto what lies ahead. I press on towards the goal!” Phil 3:13.

We cannot actually forget the past. But we can absolutely learn from it, move on from it, and put our energy into this very moment and beyond. That is what future achievements are made up of… starting right NOW. It’s about this moment. Let us begin.

3) Eagles Glide.

With a massive wingspan of up to eight feet, their wings victoriously spread out wide.

To help them soar, eagles use thermals which are rising currents of warm air. Soaring or gliding is accomplished with minimal wing-flapping, enabling them to conserve precious energy. Long-distance flights are accomplished by climbing high in a thermal, then gliding downward to catch the next thermal. Their wings are strong but heavy, so this is a VITAL part of the survival mechanism of the Eagle. Eagles are considered master fliers. They can fly to heights that no other bird can. They have been seen flying as high as some of our airplanes fly.

Several eagles soaring in a thermal together is described as a “Kettle of Eagles.”

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So World Changers… jump off that cliff. You were born to. You were trained and educated to. You must! Find the warm winds. Use your powerful wings. But also remember to glide, rest, meditate, and lean on your amazing team. Don’t pump those huge wings all the time! You don’t need too, and you may burn out. Soar when you can. You will need that energy later.

2) Though eagles mate for life, they often fly alone.

World Changing Leaders are loyal. We care about relationships and have learned how to succeed in them. Our families are very important to us.

There are days when leaders feel alone. Make sure that when you need help- you reach out for it. Find a “Kettle of Eagles” to fly in; a mastermind group, a Master Life Coach, a small group that you can be supported by, collaborate and laugh with. World changers do not have to do it all alone.

1) Eagles Live on Higher Ground.Don’t ever sell out!

World Changers are honest. They are compassionate. They give. They give when no one knows they are giving. They don’t create followers, they help support other emerging leaders! They take the high road, the road much less traveled. And that WILL make all the difference. World Changers live on Higher Ground.

world changer

Many Blessings,
sheli  G
CILC | CMC | CEBC
www.shelig.com
CEO Women Ignite Idaho Conference and Trade Show
WomenIgniteIdaho.com
International Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach
“It’s time to ignite the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

Facebook LinkedIn WordPress YouTube pinterest
Contact me: Skype coach.sheli

The New Black… for LEADERS

Vulnerability.

What does that word bring up for you?

Open. Victim. Brave. Weak. Insecure. Truth-telling.

vulnerable oprah

We tend to associate vulnerability with beliefs, people, and places that we have experienced in our past. In the English language, Vulnerability can reference various states of being, depending on the assumed or referenced context;

  • the state of being vulnerable or exposed
  • easily hurt or harmed physically, mentally, financially or emotionally

Most of the Vulnerability definitions you can find online are pretty much referring to an old-school, “bad news” come-from.

If you are military for example, you are trained not to be vulnerable, because vulnerability leaves you open to attack. This is similar to the old Corporate leadership structure. Act tough. Be “strong”. Represent a fortress-like presence so that everyone will respect you, be intimidated by you, and assume you do not have any weak spots they can prey upon.

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This doesn’t work anymore.
There are certainly moments or situations to “shore up” ourselves, and not be opened up wide. Not every situation or person is safe. However, all of us are vincible, whether we act strong all the time or not. And we all know this- not only about ourselves, but about mankind in general. (cat’s out of the bag!) It used to be fashionable to act tough all the time. But these days, the new coolness, the must-have tool in any leaders tool-belt, the new Black for Leaders is: Healthy Vulnerability, by choice.

Healthy Vulnerability…. What?
“Vulnerability is the absolute heartbeat of innovation and creativity,” Brene Brown says. “There can be zero innovation without vulnerability.” Brene has a couple of very powerful and humorous TED TALKS on Vulnerability. Brené Brown Ph.D. LMSW is an American scholar, author, and public speaker, who is currently a research professor at the University of Houston

Entrepreneurs, Leaders, Managers, CEO’s, Bloggers, thought leaders…we are all vulnerable. Yup. There you have it. Don’t fight it. You’re expending pointless energy if you resist- something leaders don’t like to do! The minute we choose into putting ourselves, our beliefs, our ideas out there, we are vulnerable. The more you do it, the more vulnerable you are. To be a WORLD CHANGER, vulnerability is a huge key to success.

vulnerable armsAccording to Brown, vulnerability is: the combination of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.
Hmmm. This is pretty much entrepreneurship.
I know- I’ve been in it since 1995. Vulnerability is the natural culture of what we do. To pretend you are not vulnerable, is to lack authenticity. It’s tough to respect, much less follow that leader. He or she is perpetuating an atmosphere of denial and anxiety. It’s real, it’s healthy, and it is more courageous for every leader to be OK with healthy vulnerability. We ask our teams to do it. So- how can we inspire our teams to be honest, and take searching self-inventories of what IS working, and what is NOT working, if we do not lead them by example?  It is what I do, not just what I say. And if what I say and do are not in alignment, (that includes alignment with the companies results) it’s quite obvious.

So, just be pathetic all the time? To everyone?

vulnerable question

Um…No 🙂

Again, vulnerability is powerful when it’s accessed at the proper time, place and crowd.

I am not saying go drinking with your peeps, and totally breakdown, with no resolve or value as a net result. (really- don’t do this)
I am also not implying you should tell all your deepest secrets to your whole team or company.

I am not saying cry all the time. That would be exhausting. 🙂

Balance and being intuitively appropriate are also leadership keys.
You don’t throw out those other skills that you have worked so hard to cultivate. You integrate them all, intuitively.

Some leaders go to extremes. “I want to be strong and have them believe I can do anything! I don’t want to be vulnerable and show my fears, failures or weak areas…”
It’s NOT either or. It is BOTH/AND. How cool is that? Knowing what tool from your belt to use, when and how is critical.
measure
LEADERSHIP then is a customized set of skills and methods, masterfully woven together in doses, at the right times and places to be effective for all. Lots of solutions, winning and connecting will come with that combo. So will production, employee retention, and stunning innovation.
 
If you are open to it, being real about both your strengths and your blinders can be inspiring. At times you may reveal things to everyone. Sometimes that may be to a small elite mastermind group in the profession, company or team.

Sometimes both the bravado of releasing a vision, and the passion behind it, followed by humble tones of the obstacles that you face, and even a tear can be a winning combination. *I am not saying put that kind of speech together. If it’s too thought out, if it has a hook or contrived agenda- then it’s not inspiring. That’s not vulnerable, that’s manipulative theatrics. Big difference, and they can feel it.

puppet on a string

When I am speaking, I am open to all facets of my personality, strengths, and tools. I know where I am going, but I feel free to authentically use the words that come up for me in that moment, not scripted out. I also access both positivity and passion, vision casting and encouragement, with vulnerability in telling real stories, and addressing REAL challenges, so that I meet people where they are. I have had bliss and failure, and so have they. We are no different at our core. We all want to have purpose. We all want successful relationships. We all have dreams to fulfill. So resonating with your team, audience, or company, versus towering over them really works. It works because it’s connection. People dig true connection. They trust it. And trust is hard to gain these days, but so magical when you do.

vulnerable 2

An Island vs. a Village

We were not born alone, on an island. We don’t get anywhere without others, bad or good.
We accomplish things in communities of people. Family, Friends, Work, Church, Charities, Clubs…..it doesn’t really matter what we are creating; we do it better together.

happy meetingWhen a leader says: What are your ideas on this issue? Let’s brainstorm on this challenge or event…. Let’s bring all our experience, education and collective wisdom together in creating a new paradigm… THAT is inspiring. That is motivating. It’s engaging! People pay attention, and feel worthy when THEY are engaged.

That means you don’t have all the answers. And- you don’t. I don’t. That means you are taking time to listen. That means you care what others are thinking. That makes a great leader. There are times when time is short, and we just get to GO, with little collaboration. I get that. If that is most of the time, you may be trying to accomplish too much, too soon, with too little perspective and feedback. Narrow scopes offer narrow results. But there can be more time, blocked out intentionally, to collaborate and grow your company, your vision, your production, your influence and reach…by enrolling others.

To enroll others, we deserve to be vulnerable, as well as all the other traits that make a phenomenal leader. Perhaps in my next blog I will tell the story of my own personal “ONE DAY” when I totally got it, that vulnerability is paramount for a great leader. It’s mandatory for me.

Not always easy. But often necessary. And worth it.

I would love to hear YOUR comments and thoughts on vulnerability, especially for leaders. And any likes, shares…always welcome! 🙂
Many Blessings,
www.shelig.com
sheli  G
CILC | CMC | CEBC
www.shelig.com
CEO Women Ignite Idaho Conference and Trade Show
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WomenIgniteIdaho.com
International Speaker
Master Certified Business Coach
World Changer Leadership & Life Mastery Coach
“It’s time to ignite the World Changer in YOU!” ~sheli G

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